Canada Goose: Andrea Antico

Photo # 2

Photo 2 reminded me of birds, imaginary birds. Whenever I think of birds, the omnipresent Canada goose comes to mind. I mind them terribly and wish they were imaginary fowl. Hence,

What’s the Use of a Canada Goose?

Oh, Jeez, No, please.
No more geese, Jeez!
You squawk. We talk
You poop. We scoop.
We toil. You soil.
Take heed. Don’t breed.
You bite. We’ll fight.
Pollute? We’ll shoot.
Pretty bird? Shi–y bird.
You preen? We clean.
Slimy poo. Grimy, too!
Plants spoiled. Grass soiled.
Killjoy. Kill koi!
Bird flu? It’s true.
Loud bleep! No sleep!
Feds decree? We’ll see.
You smell. You yell.
More geese? No, please.
We’ll get disease. Jeez!
Our grounds! Out of bounds!
We’re the best. You’re the pest.
Pesky birds. Messy turds!
You return? We’ll learn
To cook your goose.
Pate? Hooray!
A leg! An egg!
Divine with wine.
Goose stewed. Goose chewed.
What a treat! Foul meat!
From pond, goose begone!
From lawn, goose begone.
From now on, goose begone.
We fear next year.
Go away. We’ll stay.
See you later, agitator!
Fly away. TODAY!

What’s good for the goose is good for the gander!
Anywhere but Denver, you birds may wander!


Canada Goose: Andrea Antico — 2 Comments

  1. Andrea… I don’t know Canadian Geese but I’m happy to see your sense of humor is still intact even at our advanced age.

  2. Andrea, I love your poem and agree with its point of view entirely! For me, geese are at their best when flying PAST Denver.

    Thanks for such a creative poem!

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